Friday, March 13, 2009

The Inscruitible Female Mind (or I don't understand women including my 9 year old daughter)

My little girl is 9 years old and she misses her mom. Its as simple as that. I am afraid that despite my best efforts she is finding me to be a poor substitute.

Now boys are easy....play ball with them, sit with them every now and then, feed them, take them outside occasionally, and they will be fine. Men are pretty much the same...actually...I could also be describing what dogs need too....I wonder what that means? Anyway, girls are lot more complicated...at least for me...heck...I have a hard time figuring out emotionally developed, highly intelligent women in their mid 40s, so my nine year old is a complete mystery to me.

She is going through a rough patch right now. She has become my little shadow...to such an extent that she now insists on falling asleep on the couch at night as I listen to the radio and read. She has even asked me to play catch with her....and my daughter is not a baseball kind of girl. I now find that I cannot cook without her insisting on helping. She has tantrums at the slightest provocation. Yesterday we were late for school because she was upset that she was unable to sit in a certain chair. Its apparent, even to me, that she is frustrated that she has been unable to make a connection with me. This has happened before so I also know that she will go for periods where she won't have all that much interest in me. And this could happen tomorrow.

While I have been assured that she will "find moms," I really don't find that to be a satisfactory answer. Her brothers and I have been the constants in her life and I need to figure this out. I am guessing that the best thing for me to do is to remain engaged, pay attention, and make sure that she knows that I am her Dad and that I will always be there for her. The occasional corn muffin won't hurt either. Now, I will be in great shape if I could figure out emotionally developed, highly intelligent women in their mid 40s.

2 comments:

  1. I have a 17 yr old (that think she's 25) and she didn't have much of a mom growing up. There are rough patches and girls are emotional. Seems the "terrible 2's" comes back occasionally with them especially as hormonal things go later on. But as long as you are the great role model, be strong but not overbearing and a good listener, she'll be fine. Jerry

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  2. Hi! Your blog was recommended to me through your friend's "tweet" - and perhaps I can offer a suggestion or two, or exchange ideas. You sound like an awesome dad.. keep doing what you're doing.. and if your kids don't want visit their mom right now, maybe they can draw her a picture or two.. or make a card. At least you'll feel like you're helping them connect. Have a great day- Michele (ajcadysmom - twitter)

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