May 15

I was supposed to be doing something else today. Or so I thought. Once again I am reminded of the fragility of human relationships and how expectations can change with a suddenness that is both abrupt and cruel.

Had I made a series of different decisions I would be celebrating one birthday today. I had learned from that experience that there are consequences, both intended and unintended, to each decision we make, everything we do, and everything we don't do. That these acts effect those around us and that we need to proceed with care and love.

I would be celebrating still yet another birthday today had the universe been properly aligned. From this experience I learned that despite doing your best, despite acting with care and with love, some stories do not have happy endings.

However, instead of spending the day in some other fashion, I find that I am spending today doing exactly what I should be doing. I have faith that life, despite the awful things we have to endure...and loss is an awful thing...unfolds the way it does for a reason. I am going camping, in the rain, with my youngest son, who is delighted to have his dad to himself. And I am delighted to be with him.